Alien Vs Predator (2004)

Plot Outline: An archaeological expedition in the Antarctic uncovers a hidden pyramid buried deep in the ice which was clearly built by a far more advanced civilisation than ever existed on Earth. However once inside the expedition soon realise that they have stumbled into a centuries-old proving ground for a race of Predators who have been breeding Aliens to hunt since before man ever existed. Now the Aliens and Predators are loose and the expedition are stuck in the middle.

The Review: Even though it's mildly entertaining at best, Alien Vs Predator goes to show you how not to make a crossover film. Paul W. S. Anderson clearly has little grasp of the sheer enormity of the task he undertook and, considering some of the footsteps he was treading in (Ridley Scott, James Cameron and John McTiernan no less!), he was going to be sliced up no matter what the outcome was. Unfortunately for him, he does a horrid job so there's even more reason to hate the guy. This has none of the outright violence of the Predator films, nor does it contain any of the slow-grinding tension and atmosphere of the earlier Alien flicks. The film contains plenty of cheap tricks and gimmickry which you'll no doubt be able to see in any modern horror/action/sci-fi flick (like Resident Evil for instance). Since when did these two franchises become mindless summer movies? However the main focus of my rant here is at the studio for actually releasing this as a 15 rating and thus cutting out some of the heart and soul of the respective franchises. Since when did any of the six films in the Aliens and Predator franchises ever warrant anything less than an 18? Chest-burstings, horrific acidic burning, heads ripped off, spinal cords pulled out.....you name it these two series have had it all. It's what they've been built on - visceral horror. And where is it is here? Nowhere to be seen. The franchises have been totally watered down to video game violence levels for the fan boy audience. It's a cheap way to make the film commercially successful which is what the studios what - but it's the wrong way to make the films appeal to both series' fans who will be severely disappointed with what they get here. The film does it's best to try and add continuity to the lore of the franchises with reasonable stabs at logic. The two warring species are both given respectable treatment and it's great to see the Predators back on the big screen, with a host of their hi-tech weapons. The Aliens seem to be watered down losers as opposed to their more aggressive and intelligent cousins in the earlier Alien flicks but they still do their job in the shadows, dripping acid and snarling for the camera. It takes ages for the two to actually fight it out but the first fight scene isn't too bad, in fact there's a great shot of the two species just circling each other in slow motion which is one for the fan boys. But almost as soon as this starts, it's over! There's the return of the Alien queen as well who gets her fair share of screen time towards the end but I don't want to see tiny Predators being hammered by this beast - I want the fights to be a little more even! I almost forgot that there is a human element to this film and the entire lot of them are horrid. Lance Henriksen appears to add continuity to the role of an early relative of the Weyland bloodline but he's only in it because he was in a few of the others.

Final Verdict: Alien Vs Predator falls somewhere in the middle of my opinion. On one hand I look at it and think that it could have been a hell of a lot worse because the film has been rumoured to be happening for around 10 years and there was the studio battle to get it cut to a 15. But then I think of the predecessors to this film and realise Alien Vs Predator is just a horrid attempt to rejuvenate interest in the old series for the video game audience of today. I know that regardless of what anyone says about the film, you're still going to watch it. Fox knew that when they released it and now they're laughing all the way to the bank.

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