Evil Toons (1992)

Evil Toons (1992)

First they undress you, then they possess you!

Four teenage girls arrive at an old house to clean it up in preparation for its new owners. They find a book in the basement, full of magical incantations, and foolishly decide to read it, bringing to life a cartoon demon who likes the blood of young women.

 

Only during the late 80s and early 90s home video boom could people get away with making and releasing exploitative stuff like Evil Toons under the pretence of making a horror film. Despite it being a total bag of crap, I long for a return to the days of these cheap and cheerful half-horror/half-skin flicks. You just don’t get sleaze like you used to and the likes of Fred Olen Ray and Jim Wynorski seem to be relics of a by-gone era. Totally sexist, border-line exploitative and utterly sleazy, you’ll sometimes wish you actually had the balls to go and rent out a porno instead of watching rubbish like Evil Toons to get a cheap thrill.

A plot-free, scare-free, common sense-free, bargain basement trip down early 90s debauchery, Evil Toons is harmless to all except die-hard feminists – it’s done in good humour and pretty much rips on itself with some jokes here and there. It knows it’s daft and sleazy and doesn’t make any bones about it. But even with this self-deprecating humour, the film is just so trashy to warrant anything other than mild titillation and is just a cheap excuse for a bit of skin. The cartoon demon looks really shoddy and is only on screen for about three minutes, looking like the deformed offspring of a deformed Looney Tunes character. At least these three minutes of air time are hilarious as he drools over one of the girls, eyes-popping out all over the place and then says “nice tits” as he rips her clothes off. Then to clearly save on budget, the demonic cartoon then assumes the identity of one of the actresses – a nice cheap way to avoid showing the crude animated character any more and thus robbing us of the ‘TOONS’ part of the title (which is plural yet we only got one cartoon demon). But the budget wasn’t obviously going to stretch too far and they keep the cartoon to a bare minimum.

The actresses have to be some of the worst ever filmed. Their lines are delivered with so little expression it’s like they are reading from the script as they speak. However it is blatantly obvious even to a blind man why they all got cast – they all get naked at some point, with alarming frequency and they all look great in the buff so some sins can be forgiven. They strip tease, dance and fondle themselves in front of mirrors. Women are treat like sex objects in these type of sleazy horror films but its all part of its charm. I’m not condoning it but as a red-blooded member of the opposite sex, I am not immune to the subtle charms of the likes of the gorgeous Monique Gabrielle being flaunted across my TV screen.

Apart from the girls, there are also a few cameos from the likes of David Carradine (who gets top billing despite a few minutes of screen time) and Dick Miller who pops up in another brief role in a low budget flick. Arte Johnson is quite funny as the sleazy neighbour who lusts after the girls. But this is all about naked girls being terrorised by a naked girl possessed by a cartoon demon. Horror skin flicks don’t come as simple as that. Director Fred Olen Ray knows this and he’s a seasoned veteran at delivering the exploitative goods.

 

Evil Toons is as bad as the title suggests. If you want see some naked girls, rent a porno out. If you want to see a horror film, then watch Halloween. And if cartoons are your thing, I’m sure you can find a Tom and Jerry cartoon on television which looks better than this. Although whether Tom or Jerry would look better naked than Monique Gabrielle is undoubtedly a question for complete morons.

 

 ★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆ 

 

 

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