Plot
It's 1892 and
Andre Toulon is the young owner of a puppet theatre in Paris where he comes
into the possession of a secret formula which gives life to dead and
inanimate matter. He soon becomes the target of an ancient cult of demon
worshippers who are attempting to retrieve the formula that was stolen from
them by a Egyptian mystic. Toulon protects himself in the only way he can
think of - using the secret formula on his array of puppets to bring them to
life.
Review
The series takes a nosedive into the
abyss with this terrible origin story. The sixth sequel to Puppet Master,
this installment takes the unnecessary decision to head back in time to
explain how Toulon came to be. Dropping any indication of the sequel number
in the title is usually a bad sign for any struggling franchise and for
Retro Puppet Master it's the death knell. Technically it's a prequel
anyway but since the series already had one in the shape of Puppet Master
III: Toulon's Revenge, this one has to go back even further in time.
Just how old is this Toulon guy? How eventful was his earlier life that he
manages to get two films covering his early years? This is one prequel too
many though, in fact one Puppet Master film too many. The magic has long
gone. The budget has definitely long gone. The franchise is simply running
on empty.
Right
let's get the positive out of the way first. I'll at least give credit with
the series trying to reinvent itself by doing something slightly different
(if there's anything different you can do with the idea of puppets coming to
life and killing people). The novelty of seeing the puppets in their crude
original forms, plus seeing a couple of puppets Toulon obviously deemed not
good enough to keep around, is of decent enough value to waste a bit of
time. But that's it. Nothing else about this sequel is worth the effort.
Full Moon slashed their budgets for the sequels and it shows more than ever
here. With a Romanian shoot and many of the cast being Romanian, it would be
too easy to criticise the studio's decision. But why the heck not? Shooting
in Eastern European has become the norm for low budget studios but surely
with these reduced costs, the films would be able to stretch the budget a
little further to improve the special effects. Or even secure some decent
American actors willing to travel over for a few weeks shooting. Or even pay
someone to write a proper script? The script is all over the shop and like
most of the sequels, it takes great liberties with its source material. For
continuity-fanatics who religiously follow every single plot point from
previous films, there's too much going on here which contradicts earlier
films. Best to ignore it!
The
only people watching are those likely to be waiting for the little puppets
to come alive and start killing people. After all, that's what made the
original such a minor cult hit back in the 80s. For some reason, the series
has deemed that this is not the reason people watch the films and it has
slowly cut back on the puppet action. Most likely for budgetary reasons, the
fact remains that the puppets have gradually turned into side attractions in
their own films. With a very slim running time of seventy minutes, you'd
surely expect to see more of the puppets - you know, cram as much in as
possible. But you won't get any puppet action until the final third so
you've got to sit through the rest of this mess before hand as we
painstakingly wait for Toulon to learn the Egyptian secrets of the
reanimation process. When the puppets finally do show up, you'll wonder why
they bothered. It was nice to see what the puppets looked like in their
original form (Tunneler stills looks great) as well as a couple of
newly-designed puppets called Dr Death and Cyclops. But the special effects
are laughable and the puppets are virtually immobile. Even at seventy
minutes long, the film seems to struggle to fill up the screen time. The
plot is forgettable, the acting is what you'd expect from foreigners trying
to master the English language and the whole thing looks like it was thought
out, filmed and produced within the space of a week.
Verdict
Is Retro Puppet Master the worst
seventh installment of a film franchise? It's got some tough competition out
there! Stick to the first three
Puppet Master films and you'll be happy. This one fails on almost every
single level and turns into one of the most pointless wastes of seventy
minutes you're likely to endure. Avoid.
