Tag Zombies

• AKA:


• Director: Jeff Broadstreet


• Writer: Jeff Broadstreet, Robert Valding (certain characters created by)


• Starring: Andrew Divoff, Jeffrey Combs, Sarah Lieving, Robin Sydney


• Run Time: 88 mins

The beginning of the end

Gerald Tovar Jr. runs a remote mortuary and has a problem – the dead bodies just won’t stay dead after being exposed to toxic waste. He tries his best to keep this undead epidemic a secret from his employees. But his snooping brother Harold turns up demanding money after he feels he was wronged in their late father’s will and stumbles upon Gerald’s secret.

Seriously? Like the army of the undead that continues to plague the market, so too do the hack merchants who continue to leech off the inimitable George A. Romero and his original classic zombie trilogy. If it’s not John A. Russo butchering the original in his Night of the Living Dead: 30th Anniversary Edition complete with newly shot footage, it’s the duo of Ana Clavell and James Dudelson making truly woeful sequels in Day of the Dead 2: Contagium and now Jeff Broadstreet almost single-handedly trying to make an entirely new franchise around the Night of the Living Dead mantra.

Unfortunately, back in the 1960s George A. Romero, John Russo and their company failed to properly protect the copyright on Night of the Living Dead which has led to the film being in the public domain for years and which allows any pretentious hack job with a camera and some money the opportunity to use the name and create their own spin on the project. It must be heartbreaking for Romero to see his work pulverised and desecrated so often and without so much as a hint of a royalties cheque. Night of the Living Dead 3D Re-Animation has nothing to do with Romero’s original so the question needs to be asked – if it’s supposed to stand alone, why use the Night of the Living Dead moniker? Oh yeah, I forgot – $$$$$$. Shameless, unscrupulous salesmen cashing in on a classic to trick genre fans into shelling out their money.

Following Broadstreet’s appalling Night of the Living Dead 3D homage/re-imagining/walking over the grave of the original abomination/whatever it was called comes this even more unnecessary prequel which tells the story of the events which led to the outbreak. Moving just as slowly as the shuffling flesh eaters in the cellar, Night of the Living Dead 3D Re-Animation is a clunking mess from the start. It takes ages to get going, with the zombies rarely making an appearance, and there’s nothing to maintain audience interest as a result. Like many low budget zombie flicks, the film seems to go out of its way to avoid showing us the title creatures. Dull human drama. A few unnecessary side characters who add nothing to the plot. Political satire that will fail to hit its target on anyone who isn’t a US citizen. Hardly cutting edge material like Night of the Living Dead was but it’s all just gloss anyway, attempting to paper over the glaring absence of the zombies.

Horror fans should immediately be attracted to this by the two genre names in the cast: Jeffrey Combs from the Re-Animator films and Andrew Divoff from the Wishmaster series. It’s a trump card for any horror film to feature such established veterans and definitely a key selling point but Night of the Living Dead 3D Re-Animation does absolutely nothing with them. The tedious family palaver between them takes priority over any zombie action and whilst the two men are usually capable of pulling out all of the stops to keep their performances interesting (just watch them in their best work and you’ll see), they are not required to even break into a sweat here. They could have been utilised far, far better than they are here and both seem to underplay their roles somewhat.

When it comes to the zombies, they will finally make an appearance, I promise. It’s just that you have to sit through so much to get to them. Even then, it’s a wonder that they bothered. The zombies do just as little as Combs and Divoff did, stumbling around the mortuary polishing off minor characters and not even threatening a mass break-out. The gore is mainly CGI-variety, which bugs me to no end in a normal splatter flick but makes me even angrier when there are zombies involved – I like my entrails real and squishy. I understand that it’s cheap to use CGI over real prosthetics but surely the local butcher could supply some unwanted pig intestines? The 3-D is also little more than a gimmick here, with the usual shotguns and shovels being thrust in front of the camera as if we haven’t seen one in the third dimension before. A couple of decent 3-D gore moments provide some minor highlights but Piranha 3-D  and My Bloody Valentine 3-D did the groovy gore a whole lot better with the glasses on.

Originality-free. Excitement-free. Scare-free. The only thing that wasn’t free was the over-inflated price I paid for the blu-ray. Night of the Living Dead 3D Re-Animation is an appalling and cynical cash-in to a battered film legacy which deserves more respect from the fan boy defilers who pretend to worship at its feet, only to add to its abuse.

• AKA: Zone of the Dead


• Director: Milan Konjevic & Milan Todorovic


• Writer: Vukota Brajovic (story), Milan Konjevic (screenplay), Milan Todorovic (story)


• Starring: Ken Foree, Kristina Klebe, Emilio Roso, Miodrag Krstovic


• Run Time: 96 mins

The Dead Will Rise Forever!

Experimental gas which can reanimate the dead is accidentally released at a train station in Serbia, turning anyone who comes into contact with it into ravenous zombies. Meanwhile, a dangerous prisoner is being transported to Belgrade by a group of Interpol agents when they come into contact with the horde, forcing them to team up in order to stay alive.

It’s not every day that you get the chance to watch a Serbian film, let alone a Serbian zombie film, and so Apocalypse of the Dead makes for interesting viewing for genre fans. Don’t expect anything fresh or original from the Slavic country however as the film willingly helps itself to a slew of familiar material, with everything from Return of the Living Dead to Assault on Precinct 13 being pilfered for ideas that horror buffs can recognise a mile off, not to mention the obligatory Romero influence. However, just because film makers are happy to acknowledge their inspiration by referencing genre classics does not guarantee a good film. It’s a growing trend in low budget horror films that they all see fit to quote, reference or simply rip-off the classics of the past in some bizarre attempt to legitimise and give authorship to their work.

Apart from the obvious change of country and setting, there’s nothing to separate Apocalypse of the Dead from the slew of low budget zombie films of recent times. All have visions of grandeur. All attempt to punch above their weight. Most fail dramatically and this one follows suit. Zombie clichés come thick and fast including the token character in the group who is bitten and slowly turns, and the scene in which the characters finally realise that they have to shoot the zombies in the head to put them down for good. There are plenty more where that came from and it’s rather tame to see them all wheeled out again. But this is a film which plays it safe from the outset and never takes any chances.

Apocalypse of the Dead is low budget. The small cast, bargain bin production values and general lack of scope (it never really feels like an apocalypse, only a local incident) continually hold the film back from achieving any form of greatness. Not that it would be remembered as a classic in years to come but the film isn’t terrible. For every cliché that is thrown to the audience, there are moments of horror fan lip-service which strike a bit of a chord (zombie dispatch by harpoon?) and promise more than the film ever has any hope of delivering. Though the film is dialogue-heavy, there are enough action scenes peppered throughout to keep the film from ever descending into monotony, though at times the film pushes your limits before unleashing another zombie attack.

The zombies look good and it’s clear that the majority of the budget went into the make-up department. From zombies with entrails hanging out, to naked female zombies who look like they just came out of the shower, they’re a step up from the usual standards one expects from low budget horror flicks. The gore is plentiful too and whilst the zombie attacks don’t come too thick and fast, the ones that do generally provide gleeful pleasure, with intestines, limbs and other internal organs being munched and savaged by hordes of ravenous monsters. Apocalypse of the Dead at least nails it’s prime attraction down to a tee, even if everything else around it falls apart.

Presumably to add a bit of ‘genre cred’ to the film, the producers managed to rope Ken Foree, star of original Romero zombie masterpiece Dawn of the Dead, into playing a lead role. In order to give credible storyline purposes for an American to be living in Eastern Europe, the character is given a clichéd ex-CIA operative back story who left the States for personal reasons is now ‘one job away from retirement.’ Gee, it sucks that his last job is one rife with zombies! Foree is usually solid, rarely phoning in performances and once again he does his best here with the material given. He even gets another line like his legendary “when there is no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the Earth” line and it is delivered in similarly-preacher like fashion.

The same can’t be said for the rest of the cast, bogged down by thick Eastern European accents who garble the dialogue worse than the script unintentionally garbled anyway. Some of them are dubbed over but most just plod on ahead, faltering over a language which they’re not entirely comfortable with.

Whenever a film calls itself ‘something’ of the Dead it inevitably attracts comparisons to the best of the genre and it’s obvious that the majority of the innovation went into producing a rather kick-ass front cover which insinuates …. well … an apocalypse! It’s something that never materialises and you’ll end up feeling a little ripped off. Apocalypse of the Dead does some things right but not enough of them, ending up as just another undead face in the horde as a result.

• AKA:


• Director: Colin Theys


• Writer: John Doolan (screenplay), Steve Niles (graphic novel & original story)


• Starring: Miko Hughes, Lance Reddick, Grant Bowler, Tawny Cypress


• Run Time: 88 mins

This Town Will Eat You Alive.

After a nuclear explosion wipes out most of the population of Reno, a group of survivors must band together and fortify the casino that they’re stuck in, hoping to ride out this apocalyptic scenario and wait for help.

I’m not sure that there is any more originality left to be uncovered in the zombie sub-genre. Let’s face it, after decades of cinematic classics, straight-to-video cheese fests, Italian exploitation flicks, low budget home movies and every Tom, Dick and Harry trying to break into the horror genre giving their own individual slant on it, the zombie sub-genre should be left to die for the time being. But no, people still think that there is still something left to show the world. Case in point: Remains. Despite being based on a graphic novel, it seems more content in showcasing how many horror films the film makers have seen and are spooning from.

I’m not sure that I’ve ever seen a zombie film as pointless as this. Remains covers so much familiar ground that it’s so frustrating to think about what could have been. The plot sounds overly similar to the classic zombie game Dead Rising (or more specifically the sequel which was set inside a huge casino resort) and anyone who has played that will immediately know what I’m talking about. But Remains does nothing with the casino setting at all. At times, the sets are so sparsely decorated with gambling trappings that it could be almost anywhere – a shop, a school, a petrol station, a church……they have a unique location to make a zombie film and they go and completely ignore it.

So after the promise of something a bit different in the opening few minutes, the film quickly resorts to traditional zombie film conventions – mixed group of survivors holed together; zombies trying to break in to a secure location; in-fighting amongst the group; a militant faction arrives promising salvation but offering a fate worse than the zombies; the big ‘break in’ moment where the zombies manage to get into the previously-impenetrable location; etc. There are no surprise set pieces. There’s nothing out of the ordinary. Remains contains everything you’ve seen before in superior films and it does a poor job in rehashing them.

There are not too many characters to latch onto either but boy, are they boring. They all lethargically walk around, seemingly not too bothered by what has happened and more content to booze, smoke and not talk to each other than actually trying to figure a way out. There is no energy amongst the cast. It’s all very strained – character interaction, dialogue, actions, etc. It’s almost as if everyone was as bored making it as I was watching it.

I’m probably being too hard on Remains. I’ve seen the rumoured budget and it’s not a massive amount of money so I’ve got to give everyone credit for at least making the film look like a million dollar motion picture. The budget has obviously been spent on make-up effects and the zombies look excellent, each one with their own little quirks and personality. The zombified grandma at the start of the film would find a home in any full-blown Romero flick!

Unfortunately The Walking Dead has pretty much torpedoed anything zombie-related for the next couple of years and we’ve been spoilt with a truly classic horror TV series. Remains and its like are just floundering around in its shadow, looking for some niche which doesn’t exist any more and end up aimless and pointless rehashes of standard zombie tropes. There’s no questioning its ambition but we can all dream big, can’t we?

• AKA:


• Director: Tor Ramsey


• Writer: Karen L. Wolf


• Starring: Tom Savini, Damien Luvara, Jamie McCoy, Sam Nicotero


• Run Time: 90 mins

Thirty years later and they’re walking again …

In 1987, the body of serial killer and rapist Abbot Hayes disappeared from the morgue. Shortly afterwards, a zombie plague swept his home town and many people died during the carnage. Fourteen years later, a businessman arrives at the town with plans to build a car dealership on the site of the cemetery and relocates the bodies into a mass grave.

In no way connected to George A. Romero’s classic Night of the Living Dead (despite claims otherwise on the DVD cover), Children of the Living Dead is one of the shoddiest zombie films I’ve ever seen. Producer John Russo co-wrote the classic 60s shocker with Romero but it’s obvious to see who had more input in the final draft as there is not the faintest hint of any redeeming quality to Children of the Living Dead. Russo also brought to life the infinitely better Return of the Living Dead back in the 80s which also attempted to link itself with the original zombie masterpiece. Why, Mr Russo? Can’t you just make your own timeline and your own chronology?

This film reeks of cheap cash-in and Russo, along with Bill Hinzman (who played the famous Cemetery Zombie in Romero’s classic), should hang their heads in shame at trying to weasel their way into series canon. The films have to be able to stand on their own in comparison and whilst Return of the Living Dead managed that, Children of the Living Dead is a total waste of time. By trying to force its way in, it opens itself up for criticism. Well actually it does a bad enough job on its own to warrant the criticism without having it compared to other films.

The first and most overwhelming problem is that of plot and structure. The constant shifts in time with the plot are really confusing and pointless. The film conveniently begins in the year that Night of the Living Dead was made, 1968, and has the townsfolk fighting off the zombie outbreak. Whether it’s the same outbreak or not matters little because after a while, the film then shifts forward fourteen years. Now we’re introduced to another batch of characters that run afoul of Abbott Hayes and his zombie hordes. Then fast forward another year to another new batch of characters who are introduced. After two false starts, finally Children of the Living Dead settles on a group of characters to build its narrative up around but you won’t care by now as you’ve already been cheated twice. Thirty minutes in, and we’ve finally met our main characters. They’re not worth the wait!

The only good thing that the film had going for it was the sight of legendary make-up effects man Tom Savini in an acting role. As well as being famous for his splatter effects, Savini has appeared in numerous films including a memorable turn in From Dusk Till Dawn. Here, Savini plays a bad ass cop turned zombie hunter but don’t expect him to be around for long as he’s one of the characters in the first false start. He obviously owed someone a favour – what’s worse is that he doesn’t even get to do any of his classic make-up effects on the zombies. As soon as Savini bites the dust, no other actor even comes close to making their presence felt on the screen.

There’s also the question of the super-zombie, Abbott Hayes, who seems indestructible and has some magical powers to turn other people into zombies without biting. The idea is somewhat intriguing (although having one zombie controlling the others kind of diminishes the ‘act on hunger instinct’ mantra that they’ve always had) but the execution is poor and Hayes spends most of the film glowering from the trees and snarling in bushes in the background.

Children of the Living Dead is a total dud and quite possibly the worst zombie film ever made, there are only so many words that I could use to describe how awful it is. Russo should leave well alone of the desperate attempts to rekindle the success of Night of the Living Dead and let Romero do his own thing with that chronology and timeline instead of chipping in his own two cents – and yes, I haven’t forgotten about Russo’s ill-fated ‘Special’ edition of Night of the Living Dead either, another failed attempt to cash-in.

• AKA:


• Director: Samuel M. Sherman


• Writer: Samuel M. Sherman (story), Brett Piper (story)


• Starring: Scott Schwartz, Robert Deveau, Donna Asali, Robert Allen


• Run Time: 86 mins

They are evil. They are dead. They are ravenous…

A newspaper reporter hears of mysterious goings-on on a remote island and sets off to investigate, only to find a mad scientist creating zombies from the bodies of inmates at the local prison.

Reviewers like me quite often joke around about “taking one for the team” whenever we’ve watched something truly appalling. We try and warn others about certain films but in doing so we create some sort of reverse psychological fan base where people instinctively decide to check out films we rip to shreds just to see what all the fuss was about. So what’s the use?

Definitely up there in the short list of “the worst film I’ve ever seen,” Raiders of the Living Dead is just so awful that it is hard to know where to start. The cover art misleads greatly. The blurb on the back describes “zombie hunting” but there is none to be found until the final ten minutes and even then you’d probably get more gore in a children’s TV show like Goosebumps. Even the trailer on the disc makes this look like a Zombie Flesh Eaters style gore-a-thon.

One of the problems (of which there are too many to cover in a short review like this) is that there is no particular story and structure holding everything together. The film opens with a plot about a hijacker who takes control of a nuclear power station and a SWAT team is sent to deal with him. The story then abandons that part in favour of the kid fixing his granddad’s laser disc player and turning it into a laser beam (frying his poor hamster in the process). Then this story is abandoned in favour of the newspaper reporter plot. It’s completely all over the place and it is like trying to sit through three short films badly edited together. It’s a good thirty minutes before we even get a hint that this features zombies and even then its nearly the finale when the zombies finally start to do anything remotely ‘zombie-like’ by attacking people.

Even with these numerous sub-plots heading off on tangents, it is clear that the film is padded out beyond belief with filler. We watch an oil tanker drive off into the distance for far longer than we need to see. Trust me, it is an exciting as it sounds. The best part of the film is when two of the characters head to the local theatre for a movie date and watch one of The Three Stooges classic comedy shorts, Disorder in the Court. Thankfully we get to see some Stooge footage which instantly gives this film marks that it doesn’t deserve.

There is very little dialogue for a lot of the film and that’s probably a good thing judging by how bad the acting is. But everything here is from the bargain basement section: the acting, the script, the production values, the make-up, the special effects……The action is non-existent. There are no scares. There’s no atmosphere. Characters have no motivation, reason or even proper identity – it’s just a random selection of people we know nothing about. There’s just nothing here at all. Zip. Zilch. Nill. Zero. Nought. Nothing. Raiders of the Living Dead is a jumbled mix of scenes slapped together, trying their best to work as a cohesive unit but ending up a boring mess in the process. Hell, you know what…..this review is over. The more I think about the film, the more it infuriates me.

Raiders of the Living Dead is hard to even class as a film. With a ridiculously juxtaposed title (Raiders of the Lost Ark and Night of the Living Dead anyone?), Samuel M. Sherman has provided cinema with one of the worst examples of its hundreds of years of history. Nothing makes a jot of sense. The art work, the characters, the story……how do films like this even get made when hundreds of promising film makers get their dreams shattered every year through lack of funding? I know it is from the 80s but still, every decade has budding film makers waiting for an opportunity yet its stuff like Raiders of the Living Dead which manages to break free of the system. It’s a travesty.